In April of 2017 I participated in the 48 Hour Opera Festival, in which six new operas, each 10-15 minutes long, were created by teams of collaborators who were thrown together by the festival organizer, Katie Nix. On Friday the 28th, I met my composer, director, pianist, and cast (one soprano and one mezzo). By 11 PM that night I had created a libretto which was then scored and rehearsed over the next two days, and performed, beautifully, at 7 PM on the 30th in front of a full housed theater. Our soprano, Tanya, won Best Performer that night. The entire experience was a bit of a blur, to be honest, but a delightful one. Below is my libretto in full, though it isn’t anywhere near as good without the music and the singers. It’s worth noting that the festival was performed on the set of my production of The House of Yes, and thus is tailored for that design. Also that I managed to work in every one of the libretto prompts assigned by the festival, even though you only had to include one.
A Devil’s Deal
Featuring Tanya Roberts as Dora and Corinne Rydman as Elizabeth.
Directed by Sara Judge.
With music by Stephen Eddins, performed by Feona Lee Jones.
Lighting by Maxx Kurzunski. Scenery by Zoe Rosenfeld.
Produced by Opera Theater Unlimited as part of the 48 Hour Opera Festival, playing April 30th, 2017 at the Shelton Theater in San Francisco, California.
“A Devil’s Deal”
A split level apartment. Mostly empty. A sofa in the living room. A bed on the upper level. Off the bed level, a door leading to a bathroom. Off the lower level a door leading to a kitchen. Stage right, a door leading out. Behind the bed, a pair of silhouettes painted on the wall. DORA and ELIZABETH enter from the stage right entrance, DORA leading. She steps to the center of the room and twirls, arms thrust in the air, big smile.
DORA: So?!?
ELIZABETH: (wary) So?
DORA: (turning to the apartment) So.
ELIZABETH: (taking it in) Oh.
DORA: (disappointed) Oh?
(A moment.)
DORA: Well, I’ll let you look around.
ELIZABETH: Thanks.
DORA: As you can see- split level-
ELIZABETH: Ah.
DORA: And the bathroom’s just through there…
ELIZABETH: Yes.
DORA: And that’s the kitchen…
ELIZABETH: Right.
DORA: And that’s the ceiling-
ELIZABETH: True.
DORA: And there’s the floor.
ELIZABETH: Brilliant.
DORA: Real oak.
ELIZABETH: Splendid.
DORA: (pointing at one window) Morning light.
ELIZABETH: Lovely.
DORA: (pointing at the other window) Evening light.
ELIZABETH: Beautiful.
DORA: (twirling around) All of the light.
All of the light!
And just like we said upon the phone
A down payment on your new home
So low you won’t even need a loan…
Just don’t
Ever touch
The Bed
The place
Is yours
For a song
I swear
But don’t
Ever touch
The Bed
(Or lay upon it)
Don’t
Ever move
The Bed
(Not for real
No, for real
There’s a curse upon it)
You see
The boy and girl painted above?
Well, this bed,
Was the kingdom of their love
Now they’re dead
And instead
Of a bed
There’s a grave
So don’t
Ever move
The Bed
(Or their ghosts will kill you)
Don’t
Even look
At The Bed
(Or you’ll die screaming)
The boy and girl painted above?
Well, this bed,
Was the kingdom of their love
Now they’re dead
And instead
Of a bed
There’s a grave…
…With just one coffin
…Because
…They died horribly
…In a way that involved
…Bodies being inseparable
…Basically turned to glue
…It was a nightmare
…Trust me I was there…
So Don’t
Ever Lay
On The Bed.
DORA takes out her lipstick, applies it, smiles at ELIZABETH, who is horror stricken.
ELIZABETH: We should go.
DORA: But you haven’t even looked yet!
ELIZABETH: Yes I know, but…
DORA: And after all I’ve done for you!
ELIZABETH: Yes I know, but…
DORA: And we’re talking real crown molding!
ELIZBETH: We should go!
DORA: Don’t forget, this is San Fancisco…
ELIZBAETH: We should go!
DORA: You’ll never find a deal this good…
ELIZABETH: Yes, I know!
DORA: Definitely not in this neighborhood…
ELIZABETH: Yes, I know!
DORA: And not in your lifetime.
ELIZABETH: Yes, I know!
DORA: Or mine.
ELIZABETH: Yes, I know!
DORA: (pulling out a contract and pen) Just sign.
ELIZABETH: I can’t hear you.
DORA: Just sign.
ELIZABETH: I will not hear you.
DORA: Just sign.
ELIZABETH: And yet, somehow, I hear you…
ELIZABETH takes the pen but pulls back just before she signs. A moment. She turns to the audience.
ELIZABETH:
Who’s that at this hour?
Speaking inside me?
Is it my reason?
Is It my brain?
What shall I do?
Oh what shall I do?
The only people who have walls this color…
Are the sick and the Damned.
I know the nieghborhood is good
And that looks like real crown molding
But my husband would hate this…
And I’m pretty sure that I do too…
And while you shouldn’t jump to conclusions…
And while paint can turn a place around…
There’s a haunted bed
There’s an actual haunted bed
And that voice inside my head
Is shouting out in dread
Elizabeth
You don’t want to be Dead.
What shall I do?
Oh what shall I do?
With this weird but affordable apartment?
Do I walk away?
Or do I stay
And become what I’ve always dreamed…
SOMEONE WITH A San Francisco ZIPCODE!
SOMEONE WHO HAS EVERYTHING!
Oh what shall I do…
DORA:
What shall she do…
BOTH:
With this weird but affordable apartment!
DORA:
Be what you dream-
ELIZABETH:
Shall I be what I dream-
BOTH:
This weird but affordable apartment!
ELIZABETH:
Will it swallow my soul?
DORA:
Does that matter at all
If you score
ELIZABETH:
If I score
BOTH:
Score
This weird but affordable apartment?
ELIZABETH:
Does it come
With the couch?
DORA:
Yes it does.
But just so you know-
That’s haunted too.
ELIZABETH:
Oh weird but affordable apartment!
DORA:
Just look at the view!
ELIZABETH:
Just look at the view!
BOTH:
Oh weird but affordable apartment!
ELIZABETH:
Are you really all that there is?
DORA:
Well all that you can afford.
BOTH:
If you want this address
Then the answer is Yes!
In the rush of the moment, ELIZABETH signs the lease. Beat.
ELIZABETH: Have I met you before?
DORA: No.
ELIZABETH: Are you sure?
DORA: Nope.
DORA rolls up the contract, holds out her other hand. ELIZABETH produces an envelope of money and gives it to her.
ELIZABETH: (spoken) That’s my life savings.
DORA: (spoken, waving the envelope) Eh. You don’t really need one of these, anyway. Not now that you have this-
BOTH:
Weird but affordable apartment-
The apartment
Of
My/your
Dreams!
The apartment of My/Your
DREAMS!
Blackout.
FINIS